39 | Autism, ADHD & Finding Kind as a Parent | Kari Baker
Many parents enter parenthood with a picture in mind of how things will go. Then life unfolds differently. A child may have developmental differences, school challenges, therapy needs, or a diagnosis that changes the path entirely. In this episode of the Autism Family Resource Podcast, Brian Keene talks with author, speaker, podcaster, and Arizona mom Kari Baker about what it has looked like to parent her son through autism and ADHD with honesty, grief, growth, and hope.
Kari shares openly about the pressure she felt in the early years, the experience of trying to keep everything private, and the long process of moving from fear and perfectionism toward acceptance. She also talks about the inspiration behind her book, Finding Kind, and how her son’s strengths, creativity, and voice helped reshape the story of their family in beautiful ways.
This is a warm and encouraging conversation for parents who may be navigating diagnosis, school concerns, medication questions, or simply the emotional weight of parenting a child whose path looks different than expected.
Listen to the Full Episode
Listen to this episode for an honest, parent-centered conversation about autism, ADHD, diagnosis, early intervention, shame, community, and learning to focus on your child’s strengths.
Memorable Quote
“Your child was born on purpose for a purpose.”
In This Episode We Discuss
Kari’s personal parenting journey with autism and ADHD
The emotional impact of early diagnosis and feeling isolated
Why secrecy and shame made the early years even harder
The story behind her book Finding Kind
How autism and ADHD showed up differently in school and social settings
Medication decisions and what helped her family
The value of community support and connecting with other parents
Why focusing on strengths can bring more peace and hope
Key Themes From the Conversation
Letting go of the “perfect child” story
One of the most powerful parts of this conversation is Kari’s honesty about the expectations she carried into parenthood. She talks about how hard it was to release the picture she had created in her mind and how much freedom came once she stopped measuring her son against that image. That shift allowed her to see him more clearly and appreciate him more fully.
Early intervention can make a real difference
Kari describes how quickly she moved once she realized autism was likely part of the picture. She and her husband sought answers, pursued support, and began therapies early. Her story reinforces how helpful it can be when families trust what they are noticing and get support sooner rather than later.
Autism and ADHD can overlap in complex ways
Another important theme is how autism and ADHD can each show up in different parts of a child’s life. Kari reflects on how attention and executive functioning challenges played out at school, while social communication and peer relationships were often affected in different ways. Her perspective is helpful for parents trying to make sense of multiple diagnoses at once.
Community changes the journey
Kari also speaks deeply about the importance of finding people who understand. Parents who have never walked this road may care deeply, but there is something uniquely comforting about talking with other families who “get it.” That sense of community can reduce isolation and bring practical guidance, reassurance, and hope.
Common Questions Parents Ask
What if I feel ashamed or overwhelmed after my child’s diagnosis?
Those feelings are more common than many parents realize. Support from other parents, trusted professionals, and time to process can help families move from fear and isolation toward understanding and confidence.
How do I know whether my child may have both autism and ADHD?
These can overlap, and they may affect school, attention, social interactions, regulation, and daily routines in different ways. A qualified developmental professional can help families understand what they are seeing and what kinds of support may be helpful.
Why does it help to focus on strengths when there are still real challenges?
Because children need both support and belief. Focusing on strengths does not ignore hard things. It helps parents nurture the gifts, passions, and abilities that can build confidence and create a more hopeful path forward.
Why This Conversation Matters for Families
This episode offers something many parents need: permission to be honest about the hard parts while still holding onto hope. Kari does not pretend the journey has been easy, but she shows that acceptance can grow, community can help, and joy can emerge in ways many families do not expect at the beginning.
It also reminds families that their child is not a mistake to be fixed. Neurodivergent children have strengths, personality, and purpose, and those things deserve to be seen and nurtured right alongside any support needs.
Resources Mentioned
Finding Kind
Kind Families
Kari A. Baker
Gentry Pediatric Behavioral Services
Southwest Autism Research & Resource Center
Think Asperger’s
ASD Mamas by Your Side
About the Guest
Kari Baker is an author, speaker, podcaster, and Arizona mom of a son with autism and ADHD. She is the founder of Kind Families and the author of Finding Kind, where she shares her personal journey and encourages families navigating their own neurodiversity path.
Related Resources for Parents
If you found this episode helpful, you may also enjoy these resources:
Just Diagnosed? A Guide for Arizona Parents Starting the Autism Journey
Caring for the Caregiver: Self-Care Tips for Parents of Kids with Special Needs
Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapy: Supporting Your Child’s Unique Strengths
When to Seek Help: Signs Your Child May Need Occupational, Speech, or Physical Therapy
Explore more parent resources at:
https://pureheartstherapy.com/blog
